Eye patches

From Omnictionary

Lashonda was a strange girl. She had an eye patch. She enjoyed wearing eye patches even though she wasn't a pirate. She likes Pirates. Her parents had her in therapy for a few years but gave up when she ate the DSM sitting on her therapists desk. "Strange" she said, "Radical" she said, "Bee-zarre." she said. She lifted the eyepatch, but saw no better. She wore it all day, every day, and therefore had gone somewhat blind in her right eye. The girl pressed play on a YouTube video.

She liked this video, she decided after watching it. She rated and commented accordingly (as all youtubers should).

Just a few rooms away, however, sat the strange girl's forgotten brother. He was sitting at a similar computer and had just finished watching the same video. He made quite a different decision about the video, and proceeded to post a gramatically incorrect and notsome filled comment on it. What a Decepticon.

See, Lashonda never knew her twin brother, Larry. If she had, her childhood might have been very, very different indeed.

Lashonda was unique and special, like every little girl. She liked to smile, and liked to wink, which had an uncharacteristicly unique effect, since she was always wearing the eye patch. But the strange girl's eye patch had a secret, a little known secret that the girl held close to her heart. The secret laid in the diamond she hid on the eye patch's inside.

When she first first wore the eye patch, she often stared into the diamond's heart for hours. She could breathe its beauty right to the center of her soul. The diamond's heart made her smile. It reflected the strength of her character, and she its.